Tag Archive: day


So this year on the Valentine’s Day, my girlfriend and I planned to go out for dinner. When she finished her uni classes, she came to mine to pick me up. Suddenly, she said she needed a poop. She went to the toilet for a long long time, then I asked what’s wrong. Holy moly, she blocked the toilet with her sXXX. I then went to fix it.

She kept saying sorry, and I couldn’t stop laughing because it’s the first time I see this kind of events. It was going well, until I said ‘So this proves you are not perfect.’ as a joke. She asked why, I replied ‘BECAUSE GODDESSES NEVER POOP, AND BLOCK THE TOILET WITH THEIR SHIT, BECAUSE THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE PERFECT! HAHAHA!’ as a way to tease.

She got angry as an angry bird, from the time we went out, she never spoke a word. I was like playing a single game, it’s not multiplayer anymore. I finally couldn’t hold it, and asked ‘Hey, I am sorry, it was just a joke. What do I have to do to have you talking to me again?’

She pointed to a Pikachu doll in the toy shop, and said ‘Okay, so you have to pretend you are a Pikachu for the rest of the day, then we have words.’

Be a pikachu? LOL that’s a terrible request. But well, as a hopelessly romance cheeseball, I would take it.

‘Pika Pika! (Okay Okay)’ I said. From this moment, I told myself, that I am a Pikachu.

We walked, and walked. She suddenly asked ‘Yep, so where should we go for dinner tonight?’ I answered ‘Pikachu? Pika Pika Pi! (I was actually thinking The Bobbin, but I was just expecting that she would ask me to resign from my post as a ‘Pikachu’ as she does not understand what I said. However, she replied ‘Okay, Bobbin sounds good!’

Oh My Lord! She knew what I said? Did she just guess it randomly? I decided to try her with a few words.

‘Pika Pi! (Motherfker!)’, I said. She was shocked, and asked ‘Why do you swear? Swearing to me?’

Oh my lord in a box! She knew what I said! I immediately replied ‘Pika Pika Pi! (No, no no!) in a shaky voice.

So we went to Bobbin. Because it was the Valentine’s Day, it was quite full. I was even more nervous. If I kept being a ‘Pikachu’, people would notice and laugh at me. If I didn’t, a break-up is on its way.

We went to the bar to order food. It was my turn after my girlfriend ordered. I was thinking what do to. Suddenly, I had an idea, and said ‘Pi, Pi!’ to the bar-man. He looked confused, but then asked me whether I meant ‘beef, beer’. I nodded my head. Yep, done!

As we ate, I talked to my girlfriend as if I was a Pikachu. As we were about to leave, I looked at the people around us, maybe they actually thought that my girlfriend was having a dinner with a Pikachu.

We decided to go for a walk after the meal. As I walked, I felt like I had no dignity at all, and became the shame of mankind. But I looked at the girl next to me, apart from being silly making me doing some idiotic things, she is actually quite nice. (Sigh), this time she asked me to be a Pikachu, last time she asked me to be Donald Duck, what about next time…..?

She suddenly stopped walking, and whispered to me, saying ‘Thank you for being with me all the time. I hope you can be my Pokemon, forever, and ever!’

I felt so touched after this. And replied ‘Pika Pi (Thank you)’ and tears started running in my eyes.

Oh wait, tears seemed to come too quickly, that everything became blurred. I couldn’t see anything!

‘Pi! Pika? Pikachu?’ (Hey! Why? Where are you?)

‘Pikachu???’ (Where are you???)

.
.
.
.

I woke up, staring at the ceiling, finding I got tears in my eyes.

I looked at the calendar, 14/02/2016 it is.

Just when I thought i found the love of my life, it was actually a dream.
I went to the window, looking at the snow outside, thinking back to the dream,
I inhaled as much as I could, then shouted to the window
‘Pi..ka..chu! (FML)’

(The End)

Happy Valentine’s Day guys, or Independence Day to the Single Ones.

 

 

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There is a type of girls who like to touch you when they speak to you.

They are usually nice people, with beauteous smiles like the sunshine, and make you feel comfortable when you spend time with them.

Sometimes when they speak to you, they will touch you (no matter whether they actually mean it), like touching your hand, or pet your shoulder. And when you make jokes, they will show a genuine happy smile.

Sometimes if you are like the most single person in the universe, your talent of ‘Final Fantasy’ might be triggered, and think that they are flirting with you by touching you. And then, the truth is, you just think too much. They never have any intentions. And  you end up entering the ‘army’ of the girl.

It’s Valentine’s Day soon, well, guys, wake up! Don’t live in your final fantasy! It’s just a day when chocolate is on discount!

I rarely watched old films since I came to university. A few days ago, I heard the song ‘Up Where We Belong’ on Youtube as it came up as a recommended video. Then, I decided to watch ‘An Officer and A Gentleman’ as it was recommended by my mum for ages. Indeed, I think it’s a very good film.

First, in terms of actor/ actress, it was already amazing. Richard Gere, is like George Clooney, as he is what many guys would want to be when they get older. Although his acting is not that great (I would describe his acting as a piece of wood0, he looks great enough for the film. Debra Winger, as the main actress, is what I would describe as proper fit (Of course back at that time). She looked pretty and sweet. She definitely attracted me to the film even more!

Soundtrack-wise, ‘Up where we belong’ (or ‘Love Lifts us Up Where We Belong’) fits  into the theme of the film so well. Why? Because it’s about how the love relation of Richard Gere and Debre Winger kept Richard going with the U.S. Navy training camp. Well, sometimes when you do things for someone rather than yourself, you might do it better as you don’t wanna disappoint the other party.

I kinda like this film. I found it both realistic, and idealistic. It tells the truth that, some women at that time only wanted to marry navy pilot for the sake of the title. They would even set a trap (get themselves pregnant with the pilot) so the pilot have to marry them. It might happen in this modern world somehow, as in women seducing rich people for the sake of the wealth. They might set the same ‘trap’ too. Why is it idealistic? Debra Winger in the film is the idealistic character. From the first half of the film, we can see she loves Richard Gere so much, that it is nothing much related whether he is a navy pilot. She supports him through the tough time, and finally till Richard succeeds. Is this unrealistic? I don’t know, finding a girl who would support you through the tough time like she did, seems to be difficult in nowadays world, as there are too many choices for them that they don’t really have to stick to you. Well, this film got me, made me wanna go back and live in an earlier time. Well, if I were born earlier, it would mean, easier immigration, more romantic, and probably better, and simpler life, where freedom and warmth are everywhere.

‘Love Lifts Us Up Where We Belong’, yea, that’s how people get good.

Having been to the world for more than 20 years, I have never been to McDonald’s once, as the chef in my mansion feeds me with steak, caviar, lobsters… and shite like that every day. I have heard that many people like going to McDonald’s, so I decided to give it a go, with my first date.

So I took my girl to McDonald’s yesterday. It was so crowded, and yea, I understand that, it should be busy everywhere during lunch time. So I took my girl to wait at the door for the waiter/ waitress to take us in when we can be seated. LOL someone behind us asked us to leave and not to block the door! WTF?! My anger came RIGHT AWAY! I just kicked him out. Not long after, I saw the empty chairs and empty table. So I spoke to a staff ‘Table for two please.’ She replied ‘oooh okay’ then she left. What kind of restaurant is that!? So I took my girl to the table and get seated.

I waved at the same staff who ‘served’ me.
Me: So what is the meal of the day, or most popular dish here?’
Her: Huh?!
Me: Do you want me to repeat? What is the most popular dish here?
Her: I quite like Salsa Legend.
Me: (What a dumb name, no idea what it is!) Okay, can I have 2 of it please then, with the fries in American style, and Romantic Chocolate Sundae please.
She laughed, and said ‘You go buy it yourself.’

I went to the counter, then I saw the promotion of Big Mac.
‘Well I fancy beef more today, I go with Big Mac then.’ I thought.
So I made the order…
Me: The set lunch of Big Mac please. For the beef, I want medium rare. I don’t want the Fries in American style with the meal, I just want spaghetti. Any recommended wine today? And what can I choose for dessert?
The staff laughed a bit, then said ‘As for the drink, you can have the McD sparkling black water. For dessert, I get you the super crunchy luxury apple pie, and soft ice-cream with strawberry sweetie dressing sauce then.’
I thought about my date, then I said ‘Can I have a 5 Chicken Select meal, with the same drink and desserts. For the chicken, I want wings, thighs, and legs please.’
Staff: I will get you the best chicken as I will Select it for you, that’s how it’s called Chicken Select.’
Me: Okay, fine, I am eating here and not taking away. (Although I thought ‘what restaurant is it? You can get chicken select but you cannot select your chicken?!’ I thought maybe they only do regular customers.)

When the food came, my anger grew again! I told him I am NOT taking away, and he did not even give me the utensils?! At least give me a plate, come on!

Okay, fine, I took the food back to my table. Oh, did I not order spaghetti? Why is it American fries again? Poor service, got the wrong order probably. I got two sets of plastic utensils on the till then my girl and I started to dine in….. then I asked for the manager to complain.

‘Oh dear, the beef in the big mac is NOT medium Rare, it’s well-done, WHY??!! Damn, fine.
Oh dear, soft ice-cream with strawberry sweetie dressing sauce… LOL, half-frozen milk with strawberry… ridiculous
Oh dear, Super Crunchy Luxury Apple Pie? Looks like a cockroach, with some lava in it to burn my tongue…. Evil.
Oh dear, McD Sparkling Black Water? It’s simply coca cola with water….’ I shouted to the manager as a complaint after the meal.

Him: Sir, if you keep on disturbing our customers, I require you to leave.

I did not answer him. I looked at him, the food, the customers, and the logo of the restaurant. My girl rejected me right away at this first date for taking her to this bad restaurant. I looked at all of them, gave them a wee smile, then left the restaurant. At that moment, I felt like a loafer.

So, never ever, take your first date to McDonald’s!

 

 

Having studied English literature for two and a half semesters, I genuinely think that the creative pick-up lines nowadays can really be categorized as ‘literature’.

Literature comes from human life, just as Wordsworth claimed, poetry should come from rural life. John Keats had a humble life, and became a great writer. What does it tell us? Literature originates from human life, as writers get inspired from what they see in human life.

Pick up lines, or chat up lines, are as Wordsworth mentioned, human language, as they are actually uttered by normal people. One of my favourite writer, John Keats, also included a pick-up-line-like line in his letter to Fanny Browne, saying ‘I almost wish we were butterflies and liv’d but three summer days – three such days with you I could fill with more delight than fifty common years could ever contain.’ He, as a Romantic writer, is, in my opinion, the beginner of the pink-up culture, a good, healthy, and sensible culture. I would imagine that, Wordsworth, who also agreed that literature comes from normal life, would love the pick-up-line culture, and expand the lines into rhymes, rhymes into poems, poems to a poetry collection. Yes, pick-up poems, pick-up books, pick-up passages that would help you through the ice-breaking process, and kill the dead air.

Do not underestimate the structure and techniques in pick-up lines, as far as I know, a successful pick up line is usually a highly metaphorical one, hopefully rhyme a bit. For example, ‘If you can build any kind of ship in the world, what would you build? I would build a relationship!’ This one is quite a metaphorical one, it may take the hearer a few seconds to realize what happened, its construction is detailed too, putting the ‘ship’ into the word ‘relation’ to make it work, clever. If you have read the poetry of Keats’, you would also find his work is as this line, highly metaphorical. So how can you not call good pick-up lines literature? The line ‘I have got XX kg of muscle of steel, and sex appeal.’ shows that pick up lines can rhyme. No matter how Wordsworth put forward the idea for blank verse, lines that rhyme are always better and more memorable.

Pick up lines are usually successful in making the hearer laugh, and it is usually the first step in building the possible ship, what ship? Relationship. But if you are going for one, don’t quote from Shakespeare for a pick-up line, because it is highly risky. Remember a quote from A Mid Summer Night’s Dream? ‘Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.‘ It can be seen as offensive. And for Much Ado About Nothing, ‘For which of my bad parts didst thou fall in love with me?’ Do not try it either, you might get a reply with the title of the play, ‘Just that one, but then I knew it was Much Ado About Nothing.’

Pick-up lines are generally inspired by creativity and the texts you read, the more you read, the more things you can make reference to. For instance, if you do not know anything about the Science, you can never come across the line ‘Hi, I need to accuse you of causing Global Warming because you are too hot.’ Wordsworh’s companion Coleridge is correct, poetry, or perhaps literature, is as logical as Science, but just deeper as it includes Science. There should be a course in English Literature degree called ‘Pick-up course’, because it is an integral part of ANY LITERATURE in the world, and is potentially a new favourite genre of literature. Yes, I am sure if a person can create a pick-up poetry, pick-up story, pick-up biography, or maybe a pick-up novel, he can probably be crowned as the next Keats!

 

 

Frustration

Frustration

Well, this is simply to express my frustration towards table-tennis.

Now I know, although I do want to improve, I don’t get many chances to. Why? Because I have a coaching certificate! Then, I am allocated to beginners group! It’s NOT that I don’t wanna coach beginners, it’s just that I still want to improve WHILE I CAN! I can always help when I don’t want to, or have no ability, to improve anymore! But now, it’s like my heart is full of fire and someone is pouring the water to put out the fire!

I don’t know, maybe you’ll say I am selfish. I just found it frustrating when he told me ‘You should help me with the beginners’ Just WHY? Why is it me to do it? And I am sure there are enough coaches dealing with beginners! Do you think I don’t want to improve anymore? I think it’s just unfair. I did say ‘I want to improve my game!’ but definitely my request got ignored. Holy Moly, I’d definitely find some way to get rid of this, and the best method is to get someone else to play with on the same days (I don’t mind skipping the session but playing some better players so I can improve)

I know this post is pretty unclear about what I want to say, but I definitely got annoyed…. 😦

Never understand the point of New Year Countdown

Although I sometimes do the New Year Countdown with my friends, I have never understood the point of it.

‘Ten, nine, eight, ….., two, one! Happy New Year! Ahh woohoo!!!’
All the people shout like thunder, but what’s after the ‘happy-new-year shout’? There must be people asking ‘Where are we going next?’ Then, someone MUST answer ‘I don’t know, where do you want to go?’. After that, they just repeat the dialogue endlessly until 2 or 3. Then what? They just go home.

Needless today, the above is what teenagers would do. Workers? Of course they would just go home after counting down as they normally need to work on the day after!

What about those party-people? After the countdown, they are MORE THAN LIKELY to go party straight away! Well, but for those party-people, they have party at the same time everyday. What’s so special about the New Year Party? Do you get free alcohol or free food for New Year Party?

Why do we need the ’embrace’ the New Year together?
Why do we not ’embrace’ every new day together? Count down every day then!
No, no, no, we should welcome every SECOND together! HAPPY NEW SECOND folks!
Why do we countdown? Just go home and sleep, folks!